Instant Carma

During my ample commute, I have lots of time to ponder the universe. And other things. Like the rudeness of my fellow travelers. 

I find myself wishing that some divine power would smite the drivers of those offending vehicles. 

That's how I came up with Instant Carma.

Say someone is tailgating you for miles. You're not in the fast lane (in fact, there's no one in the fast lane), yet this ying-yang has taken it upon herself to school you for not going 20 miles over the speed limit. You glance into your rear view mirror, willing her to back off. You tap the brake, nothing works. You have visions of a quick stop and her mini van ending up in your trunk. You finally pull over into the speed lane so she can pass you in the slow lane. Then you get behind her.

And...it's Instant Carma to the rescue! A 1993 rusted out Chevy pulls up to HER back bumper and hovers there. The driver grins maniacally. Of course, he has no insurance. His car is a disaster. He may even tap her back bumper. A few times. Before he races away with a wave. 

In our next scenario, you're driving on crowded city streets. There is traffic ahead of you but no one behind you. The guy races up and cuts you off. Here comes Instant Carma, pulling in front of the driver and going 5 miles under the speed limit, ensuring he is boxed in and can't get around. Of course, it means you have to go slow, too, for a mile or so. But just imagining the other driver's white knuckles and the veins popping out of his neck are compensation enough.

Then we have the distracted driver. She is on the phone or putting on her makeup or eating her breakfast. She gets on the freeway doing 35 and weaves back and forth, so you're afraid to pass. Then, just as you make your move, she finishes her task and guns the engine so you can't get around her. In this case, Instant Carma appears in the form of a police car and hefty speeding ticket.

Of course, the irony is, I'm probably bringing myself bad karma for wishing ill on others. 

But honestly, I don't want anyone to be physically hurt or anything. And I know that it probably wouldn't change the way they drive. Hmmm. Maybe more drastic measures are called for.

What if Instant Carma removed the driver from the vehicle, confiscated it and gave it to someone who couldn't afford a car but would drive responsibly.

Now, that's good karma!

P.S. My idea, like most, is not really new or original. As anyone knows who has seen W.C. Fields and Alison Skipworth in If I Had a Million.